At Christmas my mom had all her gifts loaded in a huge Aldi’s bag. When I commented on it she was aghast that I didn’t have one. Next trip to Aldi’s Zi bought a few. They are the biggest, strongest, most perfectly constructed bags you could ever buy for $1.99. I can fit a week’s worth of groceries into 4 bags and carry them to the house in 2 trips or less. Even if you don’t shop at Aldi’s or bag your own groceries, you need these bags! Their roomy rectangular shape us perfect for carrying books or beach stuff. And oh yeah, it’s better for the environment too.
My mom has always lived about four hours away so she hasn't been able to spend much time with my kids. Mom is retired now and has been pursuing lots of interesting hobbies (karaoke, scrapbooking, and now writing). She started two blogs that have been such a blessing for the kids and me. In her personal blog, she shares stories from her past (mostly her childhood). I've begged her to do this for years and finally her brother talked her into it. Thanks, Uncle Keith! I now read the stories to the kids at lunch and we can all enjoy them together.
Her second blog is for her stories for children. I read these to the kids at lunch, too, or at bedtime. She uses pictures of my kids or clip art to illustrate them. What a joy it is to have my kids ask, "Did Grandma write another story?"
My mom is so creative. Leave it to her to come up with a wonderful way to stay connected with grandchildren across the miles.
While on a trip to Disney World, I read Screamfree Parenting on my Kindle. I wasn't expecting a lot, but I really got a lot out of it. Although it is not a Christian book, it is clearly written in accordance with Christian principles. The author suggests that at the heart of many of our parenting frustrations is fear. He confronts us with our own poor self-control and asks why we should expect our children to control themselves if we can't. One of his most convicting points is that every failure to discipline is a broken promise to a child. His book supports two talks I've been doing: one on fearless parenting and the other on fearless homeschooling. It's a quick read and I highly recommend it.
I have mentioned before that I use the IPhone app "Spend" to keep track of my kids' allowance. I also wanted to mention how I use it in my parenting in general. This approach can easily be used with a desktop computer or a notebook, too. I just don't like doing all the math with six kids!
I give my kids an allowance of 50 cents per year of age a week. So my eight year old gets $4 a week. Of that, they are to give at least 10% to God. I used to have at least a 10% savings rule, but most of the kids do really, really well with savings. I was also giving them interest for savings, but I was in danger of going bankrupt! The kids use their money for extras–like a shake or a happy meal if we get fast food. Or for music downloads on ITunes.
When the kids do something exceptional, I give them bonuses which is 10% of their weekly allowance. It makes it fair and it's easy to remember. This afternoon, the 4yo asked the 6yo if he wanted to sit in her chair at the nursing home. I about fell OFF my chair! That was definitely bonus worthy. On the other hand, when they do something unacceptable, they are fined 10% of their allowance. Just today I increased the fine for physical injury to 20%. I'm adopting a no tolerance policy. I'll have less hitting and if not, at least I'll have more money. 🙂 Actually, the way it works is the injured party gets the payment from the perpetrator–just like in adult life.
This kind of system may not work for you if your kids aren't motivated by money. My kids cry and cry if they get a fine. Works for me!
Right when all our economic woes began, I was reading from Psalm 37 in my chronological Bible:
The days of the blameless are known to the LORD, and their inheritance will endure forever.
In times of disaster they will not wither; in days of famine they will enjoy plenty.
If you're in need of some real encouragement, read all of Psalm 37 on www.biblegateway.com. My FIL is upset that his children's and grandchildren's inheritance has been cut nearly in half by the dive the stock market has taken. But God says our true inheritance will endure forever! Hallelujah!
Even if the hard times hit even harder, we can trust in our good and gracious God who gives us abundantly more than we can ask or imagine.
With all 8 of us in and around home most of the time, housekeeping is a huge issue. That is why I have been searching for a method of organizing chores that really works for my family for a LONG time (this picture is 2 years old).
I’ve tried magnet chore boards on the fridge. Didn’t work because the kids forgot to change their magnets around and I always had to reset them each day. I’ve tried printed lists. Didn’t work because I had to reprint them all the time. I tried the big tag board from www.familytools.com. Didn’t work because the kids were constantly knocking the whole board down. Too many times of picking up a thousand tags and reorganizing them and I was DONE with that. I’ve tried computer programs that give points for chores. Didn’t work because I had 5 kids clamoring to get on one computer to enter their chores at the same time. Actually, what they were doing is salivating over the rewards. I tried www.titus2.com’s Managers of Their Chores. That didn’t work because the oldest felt it was too babyish and the youngest was losing her cards all over the house. That was just one more thing to pick up! They also despised having the same chores for a year. Lots of bickering about fairness. I also tried Chore Olympics that I devised myself. I created sets of chores that were rotated from child to child. Each child was timed for their chores each day and the totals were added per week. The winner got a prize. Besides the fact that it took forever to add up everyone’s times, I kept running into problems when one of the kids wasn’t there for some reason. Then I have a child who will never, ever, ever win. You know the type. LOL
The biggest problem I had with all of these approaches is that I wasn’t checking all the chores to make sure they were done. I was too busy managing the systems, doing my own chores, and helping the youngest. I think I may finally have a solution. It may or may not work for you. Actually, any of the above systems may work for you if you have fewer or more organized kids than I have! But what we do now is foster cooperation rather than competitiveness. The chores are organized into sets and are assigned the same days as they were before using the same list as I used for Chore Olympics. Only now I set the timer for 25 minutes. If you’re done before the timer runs out, you call out, “Who needs help?” Prizes are awarded for everyone based on the number of days a week chores are completed within 25 minutes. Because I am helping everyone, I have the opportunity to see while we’re doing chores if the work is done. It’s music to my ears when I hear, “Who needs help?” The Lord knows I do! LOL For those who are interested, the rewards I give are a number of draws from a privilege jar I got from www.FamilyTools.com. If we get done within 25 minutes 7 days a week, 3 privileges may be drawn from the jar for each person. They only get to keep one, but the choices increase. The number of choices decreases with days chores aren’t done in time. Originally I had thought of adding choose a chore to everyone’s list if only 1-3 days we make it, but choosing a chore just is a chore for me! I have to show every child how to do those tasks. I prefer to save Choose a Chore for those times when I child whines that s/he’s bored.
I’m a Christian psychologist turned homeschooling mother of six. My life can be a little crazy, so I look for sanity-saving ideas to use and share. I hope you’ll read my About page to learn more.
