It wasn’t a health food day for sure; it was much more utilitarian than that. I made a mad dash this morning to Wal-Mart to buy shoes for my oldest. Turns out his shoes will mark the gym floor and I’ve had a week to buy new and I haven’t so there I was at Walmart buying the only size 5 1/2 for my pickiest shoe kid and praying they would work. And they did!
While at Walmart, I couldn’t resist buying Pop-Tarts that had all the college football teams on them for my football crazy boys. I was glad to get a lot of other things on my list, too–like a lamp to replace the one that was broken on the entry table. You know…the one that sat next to the little picture the kids also broke.
Then it was a mad dash to homeschool P.E. It warms my heart how Miss E looks after her little brother. The big issue with P.E. is always when we get there (if the kids get there early, even the preschoolers can play; note that we were NOT early) and what toys to bring. P.E. is a day to learn sharing skills. Today we learned to share Mr. Potato Head and dress-up Larry Boy. Well, maybe we didn’t really learn it but we tried.
We packed up our toys, went home, did chores, ate lunch, and that’s when the real fun began. On Monday at Incredible Pizza, I warned my kids that the jars of slime they bought would NOT under ANY circumstances come into my house. The last times it did, it stuck to my rug and my sofa. Little did I realize that the stuff that I now refer to as Satan’s saliva could wreak havoc even if left outside. My 6yo thought it would be hilarious to smack himself in the forehead with the green slime.
You guessed it! It stuck to his white-blonde hair like fake cheese to a McDonald’s burger.
I had just cut the child’s hair and when I mentioned that I would probably have to cut it out, the tears started flowing. So I whipped out my trusty IPhone and looked up how to get silly putty out of hair. That’s because in the stress of the moment, I couldn’t remember the name “slime.” Turns out that olive oil Pam removes it slicker than slime. Just spray it on and comb it out.
I’d saved the day but had to insist that the fortunate patient shower immediately to remove the greasy residue. He complied and just a few moments later I heard a crash. The shower door bumped into the vacuum which landed on the ceramic trash can and it was garbage. His question was, “How much do I have to pay for that?” See, I’ve been fining the kids for things they carelessly destroy. I told him this was a freebie as it wasn’t extreme negligence. It would have been hard to justify since his father destroyed another bathroom trash can last week. If he were getting an allowance from me, he would have been fined. But that was another week.
After cleaning up the mess, it was time to teach the kids how to edit the video we just taped last weekend. The kids were so excited to see the footage we shot and I was, too. Except all we had was more garbage. A jumbled, garbled mess. We suspect that the brand of tape was the problem. I will be buying more of the previous kind (Sony I think) and we will be re-shooting. My hubby said, “I guess it’s just the nature of the biz.”
The kids had friends over to play and I popped a pizza in the oven. Thank you God for pizza that bakes in just 12 minutes. I am uneasy about the fact that my kids prefer cheese pizza. I remember turning my nose up at parents who allowed their kids to be that picky. Just another example of how God turns me into everything I scorn.
It was back to the car for church class and football practice. After picking them up, it was time for basement clean-up (my latest in about 100 different efforts to get and keep the playroom clean) or there would be no dessert. There WAS dessert, thankfully.
I decided to reward myself with a protein shake and an episode of the Biggest Loser in the family room. That’s where I found the collection of wooden letter pieces from Handwriting Without Tears. These pieces are supposed to teach children the basic letter parts so they can write. And it’s supposed to do it without tears. I guess without theirs, because I’ve shed quite a few over it. I have grown so weary of picking up these pieces that get scattered to every corner. How these emerged from a LOCKED file cabinet when I have the only keys I will never understand. Even the dog likes chewing on these things! I should have bagged the $50 train set and
invested in wood pieces long ago. The evening ended with a bath for the two littles. I am trying baby oil and serious dandruff shampoo that is supposed to work on the cradle cap that takes the 2yo’s hair with it when it comes off.
So here’s what I’ve learned today. I have a really, really hard job. I need a raise.