One of the most common questions I get from young mothers is how to find time for personal devotions. We all know how vitally important it is for having the energy we need to do all that we do, but when you’re up multiple times feeding a baby, awakened early by a toddler, and even chased into the bathroom by your kids, how can you find the time?
I’ve been there. But I had very little distress about my devotional life during that particular season of motherhood (my youngest is now six). Here’s why:
I Redefined Personal Devotions
Is devotional time an hour spent in your quiet spot reading the Bible, completing in-depth Bible study assignments, and praying over every need in neatly organized categories? Sure, but devotions can take many different forms.
Having devotions can also mean taking minutes, seconds even, to connect with the Lord. It can mean meditating on just one Scripture throughout the day. It can mean talking to God out loud while your children observe you. “Help me!” may be all you manage to eek out. It can mean forgoing formal Bible study during this season of your life. It can mean reading a brief devotion online while going through email. Devotional time can be praying with your husband at bedtime. It can be singing or playing an instrument. It can even be devotions that you share with your children. Susanna Wesley is said to have found time to pray by sitting amidst her children with her apron thrown over her head: Susanna Wesley (Women of Faith (Bethany House))
The best thing I can say to you tired, time-pressed mom is not to feel bad. The Lord knows you are in a season of your life that requires much of you. He is caring for you and hearing the Spirit groan for you on your behalf even when your lips aren’t moving.
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans (Romans 8:26).
But What if You are Desperate for More Time?
Ask for help. Ask your husband to give you some time so you can read the Bible and pray alone. I hired our niece to come and help out one afternoon a week. A moms’ Bible study group I was in often hired sitters so we could study and discuss God’s Word without interruption.
Pray about it. Ask the Lord to give you more time with Him. He may get you up early, but not the littles! I firmly believe that He answers these prayers–just not always the way we expect.
Be content. I used to be frustrated that I couldn’t do more of the reading and studying I wanted to do. Now I have more time and I wonder what I fussed about. Even now, though, busy as I am, I pray and read one chapter of the Bible per day and then read Matthew Henry’s Concise Commentary on it. This process takes me just half an hour. The rest of my devotional time is spent with my family and church.
Do you have other advice for young moms looking for ways to spend time with the Lord?
Some homeschooling parents insist that their children have regular bedtimes and get plenty of sleep. Many of these same parents are up late and aren’t giving themselves the benefit of at least seven hours worth of sleep.
Some homeschooling parents don’t have regular bedtimes for their children who often aren’t getting enough sleep. Typically these parents are also sleep-deprived.
If you and your children have regular sleep routines, you are likely to be healthier and more motivated than the rest of us. Just be careful that pride isn’t your downfall. 😉
Why Sleep is So Important to Homeschoolers
My teenage son, who likes to test the limits of sleep deprivation, recently asked me about dreams. He thinks I know way more about psychology than I do and I let him persist in his delusion. I equated dreaming with website maintenance. Websites typically become unavailable while work is being done to enhance their efficiency.
In the same way, we need to sleep so our brains can form new connections based on what we’ve learned. My theory on dreaming is that as the brain works, sorting through the events and emotions of our day, the conscious part of our brains tries to make sense of it all. The result? An often nonsensical dream that we will only recall if we wake up in the middle of it.
Sleep deprivation means that information doesn’t get stored in our memories. It means that our brains and even our bodies will operate less and less efficiently until eventually we have to go offline. We get sick.
decreased perception of ability (students assume they “can’t do it.”)
These behaviors are exactly the opposite of what we want in our students (and ourselves!).
It’s Not How Much, But When
Homeschoolers often feel comfortable keeping erratic sleep schedules because they know their schedules afford them the flexibility to sleep in or make up for sleep deprivation later. However, studies suggest that being able to make up for sleep loss may be a myth. In college, I learned that even more important than the amount of sleep we get is the regularity with which we get it. What’s more, a constantly changing sleep schedule is likely to interfere with your ability to sleep soundly–even when you’re tired.
The summer I did a 12-week Body for Life transformation, I got up at 6 a.m. every morning and went to bed around 11 p.m. each evening. I have never felt more energetic. While I still keep this schedule in general, there are too many days and nights that I vary from it…and I feel it!
And my kids? I’ve mentioned before that my kids are up late and sleep late, but I think we need to be more consistent with bedtime in particular. I hope to motivate my husband to help me by having him read this post and the ones referenced at the end of this post.
Do a Sleep Study
I participated in a Track Your Happiness study using my iPhone. I was able to look at a graph that compared how much sleep I got with my happiness. There wasn’t an obvious relationship. If instead, I had a comparison between my sleep schedule and happiness, I am sure I would have found consistency equaled happiness.
The blog post, Homeschooling and Sleep Deprivation: 8 Things You Should Know, suggests you do a sleep study at home. I love this idea! Have your children help you with a little psychological research. Record the times you and your children go to sleep and wake up and also have them rate themselves on variables you consider important to homeschooling (e.g., attention, cheerfulness, assigned work finished). You may want to rate them, too. I’d like a dollar for every time one of my children has screamed at me that they’re not tired. 🙂 You may want to consider having two experimental conditions: 1) Allowing you and your kids to sleep as they currently do or as they choose 2) Going to bed and getting up at the same times.
When you have the results (I suggest at least a week to gather data), ask your children what conclusions they draw. Is an amount of sleep or a regular sleep time important? If so, what changes do they think should be made with regard to sleep?
Home educators have a lot of demands on their time. We may have multiple children, some of whom are babies or toddlers who require extra care. Some of our children may be teens who aren’t yet driving, yet are involved in numerous outside classes or activities. Then there are homeschooling parents who have a home-based businesses or work outside the home. We want to teach our children well, but we wonder:
Is there a way of providing a quality education in less time?
Some homeschoolers think so. The idea is that you teach the essential material in just one hour a day, leaving the rest of the time for the children to do independent work, related assignments, or pursue their own interests in an unschooling approach.
What Would an Hour a Day Homeschool Look Like?
Teach one subject or do memory work for six subjects, ten minutes each
Teach four subjects (math, language arts, Bible, read aloud) for four subjects, fifteen minutes each
Teach two subjects (math, language arts) for thirty minutes each; these could be switched out daily
Teach one subject for an hour each day on a rotation
Teach an hour for older students and an hour for youngers
Teach for more than one hour using any combination above
Teach this way when you’re pressed for time
I have used the latter approach many, many times. A repair person comes, the phone rings, I have to pick someone up from the airport–you name it–and the time I have left for teaching is down to an hour. I often use the ten-minute per subject approach. Most of the time I teach for three hours using a combination of approaches. I have six children, some of whom require more intensive instruction in reading. As they mature, less of my time will be required.
But Don’t Students Need More of Your Time?
Yes, they often do. That’s why every teacher who uses this method must make themselves available to tutor and answer questions. You may be spending only an hour of focused time “teaching” your students, but they will be spending many hours relying on your tutoring and learning on their own.
Want More Information About Homeschooling in an Hour?
Check out Homeschooling-Ideas and Homeschool.com that reference a father whose six children were homeschooled in an hour a day and attended Stanford. He notes that he used this approach with older children.
You can cover many of the essentials in LESS than an hour a day with Classical Conversations.
What Do You Think? Could You Homeschool in an Hour a Day?
There are people who have impacted my life simply because they have gone above and beyond their duty. They are ordinary people whose humble service and love for others have impressed me more than anything fame, money, or position could do. The Fred Factor calls these kinds of people Freds, after a postal serviceman who went far beyond the ordinary to excellence.
Freds I’ve Met
I met Freds in an oil changing shop one afternoon. I was given a flower, had the car door held open for me, and was treated like a princess. I’m sure those Freds had no idea how profoundly impacted I was by their kindness. I cried all the way home because life hadn’t been treating me like a lady then. I met Freds at church. Two of them invited me into their home to share a delicious homemade lunch many Sundays when I was in college. The gentleman in this home handled all of my car repairs for me, making sure that he either paid for them himself or got me the absolute best price possible. Another couple of Freds invited me into their home to live when my college roommate situation wasn’t working out. I meet Freds all the time. I have a waitress who helps my children cut up their food. I have homeschool friends who come to my home for co-op who clean without being asked and jump in to help with projects that have nothing to do with homeschooling. A homeschool author read So You’re Not Wonder Womanand started promoting it on her website.
The Fred I Want to Be
I want to be someone else’s Fred. Why? Because it’s the true measure of greatness. Say Good-bye to Whining, Complaining, and Bad Attitudes calls being a Fred ‘honor.’ It’s doing more than what’s expected. The Bible calls being a Fred a servant.
The greatest among you will be your servant. (Matthew 23:11)
I realized in reading the Fred Factor that I rarely seek to be a Fred in my own home. That needs to change. I can have the greatest impact with the people I love most. That means that I am not just getting by or doing the quickest, easiest thing. It means I am giving my best for the service of my family and the glory of God.
The Freds I Want My Children to Be
Talk with your children about the Freds you’ve met. Tell them what a great impact they have had on you. Read the Scripture about what it means to be the greatest in the kingdom of God. Then discuss what they could do to be Freds in your family, in your church, and your world.
What Freds have made the biggest impact in your life and why?
I’m in my 13th year of homeschooling and for the 13th time, I have spring fever. Fortunately, I know the right prescription for my chronic ailment: a homeschool conference. I attended a local homeschool conference last week and left with excitement to spare. Of course, that excitement doesn’t last. That’s why I like to buy recordings of seminars that I can listen to when my motivation begins to wane once again.
A couple of years ago, I discovered an online homeschool expo. It’s a year’s prescription of homeschool motivation. While there are live speakers (I will be speaking on “Help for the Unmotivated Homeschooler on April 24th at 1:00 p.m.), you can be inspired by quality recordings while you travel, workout, or do housework. The opportunity to peruse books, curriculum, and great gifts for the kids at a local expo is always rewarding. You’ll have the same opportunity at the Ultimate Homeschool Expo. The tickets are a bargain when you consider the cost of a local expo and even one CD ($6).
Do yourself and your kids a favor: get your ticket to the Ultimate Homeschool Expo today! For more information, click the EXPO tab and scroll down. I hope to talk with you live on the 24th!
Any advice for homeschoolers attending an EXPO for the first time?
I’ve shared my enthusiasm for Learn Math Fast as a means of learning math facts, but it’s also a great method for kids who are behind grade level in math. I asked the author to guest post on the subject and I was thrilled when she agreed. I have Volume I of Learn Math Fast (a $45 value) to give away by April 1st. Follow the Rafflecopter instructions below and best wishes!
by JK Mergens
Homeschooling your child can be a beautiful journey full of magical moments, but for some, teaching math isn’t one of them.
Many families have told me how they have tried nearly every math curriculum out there. They’ve tried manipulatives, worksheets, DVDs, online programs, and nothing has worked for their struggling, older child. The clock is ticking; high school is only a couple years away. What are parents to do when they discover their 7th grader is barely passing 3rd grade math? How can they possibly make up 5 years of math by next year? How do you convince a 12-year-old boy that he needs to read a first grade math book, adorned with cartoon animals and big, puffy letters? When you feel your child needs to start over from the beginning and actually learn math, instead of guessing or counting on their fingers, you should try the Learn Math Fast System.
The Learn Math Fast System has a unique approach to explaining math–one that is working for hundreds of homeschooling families across America.
The system consists of four paperback books and one geometry kit. It is designed to be read from page one, which starts with first grade math, all the way through to the end of book four, getting your child caught up to eighth grade math in about a year.
How is this possible? The Learn Math Fast System focuses on the most important concepts in math and cuts out all the filler and fluff. The math facts are taught using a systematic approach to ensure that all gaps are filled in, giving students a solid foundation along with an understanding of higher math.
It doesn’t matter if mom and dad are rusty in math, the Learn Math Fast System assumes the reader is new to each concept. All answers include full solutions, so you aren’t left wondering how to get the right answer. And if you need additional help, you can contact the author via email anytime.
If you like the fun, casual math in the Life of Fred books, the high school preparedness of Saxon math, and the success of Singapore Math, then you will love the Learn Math Fast System. It can successfully prepare your child for high school math in about a year, with a fun, casual program.
The giveaway is over, but you can save $5 on this system with code DRMEL at the website.
I’m a Christian psychologist turned homeschooling mother of six. My life can be a little crazy, so I look for sanity-saving ideas to use and share. I hope you’ll read my About page to learn more.
