Getting Fit NOW or Never on Facebook posted this photo explaining that this young woman had allowed her boyfriend to tattoo his name on her face as a sign of her love. By the way, his name is Rus, not Bus.
The comments summarized what I initially thought of this decision: dumb! Definitely one of those dumb ways to live I have discussed earlier. But I couldn’t get this picture out of my head.
Why I Couldn’t Stop Thinking About This Picture
You don’t have to be a psychologist to know that this poor girl is going to regret her decision. The guy will cheat on her or dump her. Beginning a new relationship will be very difficult. Who wants to bring home the girl with another guy’s name on her face? But maybe I’m too pessimistic. She could beat the odds and stay with her boyfriend for life–maybe even get married. But her life is still ruined. People will always assume she is a reckless rebel, even if she matures. She could get the tattoo removed, but will be scarred for life.
Why Every Parent Needs to Save This Picture
Not one of the thousands of commenters on Facebook applauded what this girl did. They all thought it was stupid! But there is something our children may choose to do that will scar them for life that WOULD be applauded by the majority of people on Facebook and even the majority of people in your church: have sex outside of marriage.
Pam Stenzel warns young women that while a guy they sleep with may be able to walk away from premarital sex without a devastating sexually-transmitted disease, they aren’t likely to have the same fate. One in four young people today has an STD and many of these diseases aren’t curable. Among those that are, many have no symptoms and aren’t treated. The consequences include potential infertility, cancer, and even death.
I share with 8th graders at my church that while it IS possible they can have premarital or extra-marital sex and not be scarred physically, they cannot avoid the spiritual scarring. Andy Stanley teaches that every person we have sex with takes a little bit of our soul. Why? The Bible teaches that sex creates one person out of two (Gen. 2:24). To demonstrate this, I have sealed an envelope. Then I attempt to unseal what I have made into one, representing a break-up or divorce. There are pieces left behind. In other words, try to separate from someone you’ve been made one with and you’re scarred for life.
I urge you to share this picture with your older child and talk about the scarring we experience when we have a physical relationship with someone we’re not married to and walk away. For girls, it’s like having a guy’s name tattooed on your face and then being rejected. (Please pray for this poor young woman.) For guys, it’s like tattooing your name on a girl’s face and leaving her scarred physically, emotionally, and spiritually.
What Other Resources Do You Recommend for Teaching Your Kids Purity?
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I was born with soft, paper-thin, peeling nails and never understood why I hadn’t been given the gene for my mother’s gorgeous fingernails.
I never bothered to paint them, because in no time, my nails would tear off and look hideous anyway.
The Search for a Solution
As a teen, I’d heard that Knox gelatin could change my nails. I can’t honestly say I consumed lots of this stuff, but what I did eat didn’t seem to make a difference.
I tried getting expensive salon nails, because I figured I was destined to require them. I was at a dance when mine started flying off, leaving even thinner nails behind.
My next attempt at rescuing my nails was to use a nail strengthener. Over the past 30 years, I’ve used many of them. They always worked temporarily. If I was religious about using them, my nails grew a bit before they were torn off.
The most researched solution I tried was biotin. This vitamin is supposed to make a difference in your nails, but alas for me, it didn’t. My nails continued to be weak, despite taking biotin faithfully.
I was hopeful that I had found the answer, however. Lack of iron is supposed to contribute to poor nails. As I’d been anemic in the past, I figured iron supplements would do the trick. Nope! Layers of my nails continued to peel.
I was ready to give up when I read an article online that gave me the surprising solution to my no-nails dilemma.
How to Grow Your Nails
1. Keep your nails from getting wet. If you wash dishes or clean with wet solutions frequently, wear gloves. I knew that wasn’t my problem. Instead, as long as I could remember, I had put my nails in my mouth. A lot. I didn’t bite them off, but I put them in my mouth as a nervous habit. When I was driving or trying to solve a problem, my nails went in my mouth. When I was most anxious, I chewed them like leather.
2. File away the rough edges immediately. I wasn’t doing this consistently. I put it off, ignoring the fact that rough edges made it inevitable that my nails would catch on something and tear off.
I had to be constantly vigilant to put this advice into action. I had no idea how frequently I put my nails in my mouth! And what’s more, I couldn’t believe that I thought I could chew on my nails and have them be strong. But as I refrained from doing so and filed as soon as I saw any sharp corners or ragged edges on my nails, they started to grow.
My nails had grown before, but this time was different. While they weren’t rock hard nails, they were strong. I could actually tap them on the counter and make noise! And that was without nail strengthener. The photo taken above was taken before I had grown them to their maximum length. Surprisingly enough, I’ve found I don’t like them as long as they can be! I’ve cut myself with them playing tennis. For the first time, I actually have to trim my nails with a clipper. They’re so strong that they don’t tear off. They actually break!
What Does This Have to Do With Changing Your Life?
No, having longer, stronger nails hasn’t really changed my life. What has is what I’ve learned in growing them out. As with so many other areas of my life where I’ve desired change, I spent lots of time looking for the unique solution to growing my nails. I was sure there was some magic potion that would accomplish what I wanted. There wasn’t.
Instead, I learned that most of the time, changing your life means not destroying it yourself. It isn’t that we need a new diet or exercise plan. We need to stop eating when we aren’t hungry. It isn’t that we need a better coupon organizing system; we need to stop buying things we don’t need. I didn’t need to find the right nail strengthener. I needed to stop weakening my nails by putting them in my mouth and chewing them. I was like the foolish woman who tore her house down with her own hands (Prov. 14:1). It wasn’t genetics that had destroyed my nails; it was me.
The solution is often so simple, we don’t see it.
The second piece of advice is like it. Filing away the ragged edges immediately is like addressing life’s problems right away. When we eat those cookies when we’ve already had a filling meal, we need to ask ourselves why and take steps to prevent it in the future. When we come home with a purchase we don’t need, we need to return it right away. It’s like my mama always used to say: “Nip it in the bud!”
If we ignore this wisdom, we will continue living with weak nails and a weak life. We’ll waste our time and money on solutions that aren’t solutions at all.
What about you? What have you tried to grow your nails and change your life? What will you try now?
Have you wondered if a new approach to productivity could help you in your home management, homeschooling, or business? I have.
My Passion for Productivity
My life is full with being a wife of an active husband, a mother of six, a home educator, fitness enthusiast, scrapbooker, tennis player, church volunteer, speaker, writer, and more. Over the years, many people have told me that I need to learn to say no. So that’s just what I say to them: “no!”
I love everything I do and I don’t want to eliminate any of those roles or activities. What I do instead is seek to make the most of every precious day I’ve been given. That means I try lots of productivity tips, techniques, and tools. People who know me best laugh when I talk about my latest-and-greatest way of working, because they know it won’t be long before I’m on to the next thing.
Can You Relate?
My guess is you can. Posts on productivity are some of my most popular here on Psychowith6 and I couldn’t be happier about that. I have to write to you about my passion, because my friends won’t listen to me anymore!
It used to bother me that I couldn’t just stick to one approach to time management. It doesn’t anymore. As Loren Pinilis of Life of a Steward reminds us, God is okay with us finding what works for us. Doing that may require lots of exploration to fine-tune your system.
Use a different productivity approach every week for a year
I’m going to rate each method and write about it here. I know, it’s nuts. I’m sure the crockpot lady asked herself what she was thinking after the first week! But I’m going to lay down some ground rules that I think will help:
If I need to quit doing something because I absolutely hate it, I will. The point is not to torture myself, but to discover what works for me and maybe for you, too.
I won’t completely abandon strategies I’ve come to rely on. For example, I use Google Calendar alerts on my iPhone to keep me from forgetting appointments.
I’m committed to writing about the approach I’ll be using for the upcoming work week each Friday, but I’m more committed to my family and my sanity. If something comes up, I’ll try to let you know on the way to the hospital. Not.
I reserve the right to take vacations and the right to call the end of December 2013 “a year.” So I didn’t start this January 1. Sue me. I’ll return your money.
Care to Join Me in a Year of Living Productively?
If you prefer to read as you’re able and silently snicker at my shenanigans, feel free. But if you’d like to take the adventure with me, I’d love the company! You’ll have the weekend to prepare to use the given method. Come Monday, give the new approach a shot and report back on your results, rating it for its ability to help you be productive on a 1-10 scale. If you’re a homeschooler, you could even try some of these methods with your older kids and get their feedback. And if you have a method you’d like me to test for you, I will certainly be your productivity guinea pig.
Week 1
Because you don’t have much advance notice,Week 1 is going to be the Old Faithful paper to-do list. Nothing fancy! You can use a sheet of paper, a pretty notebook, or a note card–just no sticky notes. Write down anything you have to do on your list and cross it off as you complete it. There are no other rules than that.
You homeschool because you feel called by God to teach your children. You homeschool because you want to build their godly character. But let’s be honest. You also homeschool because you want your kids to be smart!
At the very least, you want your children to have a good education. You don’t want them to end up on Jay Leno’s Jaywalking segment. (This is when he asks people questions like, “When was the War of 1812?” and they don’t know.)
Why I Wanted Nothing to Do With Classical Conversations
Friends’ experiences with Classical Conversations (CC), while positive, did not convince me that it was for me and my family.
Expense. I thought CC was outside classes that were much too expensive for a large family like mine.
Time. I thought CC would require me to be gone one day a week. That simply wasn’t possible with our family’s schedule.
Dry. When I began homeschooling, the prevailing thinking was to avoid traditional ways of doing school. I knew CC involved lots of memorization. I wanted my kids to read living books and learn actively instead of learning by rote.
Why I Changed My Mind About CC
When my CC-loving friend suggested that I buy the old materials that were on sale cheap, I decided to do some research. I found and read Leigh Bortins’s free ebook and something clicked. I had been homeschooling long enough to learn that memorization was not all bad. While not always fun, it laid the foundation for advanced learning and making connections. I had seen this at work in my teen who learned music as a child, quit the piano for a couple of years, and then returned to it with a passion.
I learned that my children did not have to attend outside classes. I could use CC materials to help my children memorize key information in the major areas at home. What’s more, the materials were quite inexpensive at the time of the sale and buying used. Even new, they’re a bargain for what you get.
I discovered that my kids love to memorize. I sold them on the idea that if they would memorize the information covered in CC, they would be smarter than 95% of other kids. I should note that I just made that figure up. Don’t tell them. The great thing is that they were so motivated that they begged to continue with the second semester’s material when we’d finished the first early.
How to Make CC Work for Your Family
The wonderful thing about doing CC at home is that it works alongside any other curriculum you choose. Using it at home as I do also means that you can use the Cycle that you want (which corresponds to periods of history) and can leave out any aspects you choose. We are using Cycle 3 this year as we are studying American history. We do not do the Latin, choosing instead to study Latin word roots with flashcards. We also don’t use the suggested art or science experiments as we have other curriculum for these subjects.
CC is great for any age, making it perfect for large families like mine. I use the CC CD with Power Point presentations. I connect my laptop to our large-screen TV and everyone can see and hear. My kids, ages 7-14 participate. I explain the purpose of the skip-counting and laugh along with them at the silliness of some of the songs (i.e., the singer laughing at the end of some history songs that seems out of place). We also freely discuss whether or not we like the various songs, which seems to make the process more agreeable.
CC is time-efficient. If we get nothing else done but Bible and CC, I know we’ve covered the most important material. You and your kids can quickly review history, geography, science, English, math, and Latin if you choose. In addition to the CD and guidebook (see a sample of the guidebook here), we also own the history timeline cards. Ours are in clear plastic sleeves in small binders that we got used. We learn these historical events in order as a family, covering just two new events a day. Can you imagine you and your children knowing all the major events of history IN ORDER in one school year? You will experience it if you use this curriculum. If you’re pressed for time, simply cover and review the week’s new material. If you have more time, review the facts you’ve already learned. A full review takes us about 30 minutes. New material takes us only 5-10. You can also purchase music CDs to listen to in the car. I don’t like them because the material isn’t presented by week, but rather by subject. The computer CDs are organized the same way, but are much easier to navigate than a CD player in a 9-passenger van.
You can make CC the basis for a full curriculum if you choose. There are websites like this one with suggestions for how to do it. You can get more information about Classical Conversations at the website and be sure to check out my podcast where we discuss Classical Conversations community programs and ideas for making it work with your curriculum.
What Do You Think?
I should say that I am not affiliated with CC in any way, nor have I received any freebies for this review (too bad, huh?). I’ve just become convinced that many homeschoolers could benefit from including this excellent curriculum in their day.
Have you tried CC classes or curriculum? Are there other reasons that you don’t think CC is for you?
You were so excited the day you brought your shiny new curriculum home from a homeschool conference, the bookstore, or the mailbox. But now the school year is over, your children have grown, or you’ve decided to use something new. What’s the best thing to do with your old materials?
Or… you’ve been to a homeschool conference or you’ve been researching online and you’ve found a curriculum you’re in love with, but the price tag? A little too steep for you. Where are the best places to go to find what you need at the best possible price?
Best Places to Buy or Borrow Used Curriculum
Do you have other suggestions? Comment below. One commenter shared that she compares prices on used items at Bonavendi. Give it a try!
Your Local Support Group
You’re not a member of a local support group? Becoming a member is the first thing you should do! Click this link to search for homeschool support groups near you. Many support groups have lending libraries that are searchable online. You may find exactly what you’re looking for there for nada. But even if your support group doesn’t have a lending library, you may be able to borrow curriculum from another member. Many support groups have an online forum, Facebook, or Yahoo group where you can make your request known. No local support group where you are? Consider joining an online group, preferably for your state or region.
A Local Used Curriculum Sale
Find out from homeschoolers who know where the largest sale is near you and plan to attend. Pray that you’ll find what you need at just the right price. Earlier in the day you’ll get the best selection, but later you may get the best price. Sellers may be willing to take much less in order not to have to take their materials home.
A Local Bookstore or Library that has Materials on Consignment
An advantage to shopping a local bookstore or library is you aren’t constrained by used sale dates or times. Often the management also prices materials appropriately and won’t accept books in shoddy condition.
Amazon
Search for the books you need on Amazon, then look at the Used options. I’ve purchased numerous books at a penny over shipping and handling. You’re less likely to find complete curriculum that includes binders or audiovisual materials here. In fact, if you are ordering something like Shurley Grammar from Amazon used, make sure the CD is included. If it isn’t mentioned in the listing, contact the seller and ask.
User Groups
These are like support groups for particular curriculum in the form of an online forum, a Yahoo group, or Facebook group. Who better to buy used curriculum from than a group of people who are looking to unload theirs? User groups are not exclusive to curriculum, but are also for approaches to homeschooling. If you’re a classical homeschooler, for example, you may be able to find everything you need used from a classical user group. The Well Trained Mind Forum has listings of used curriculum. Google the curriculum or the approach you’re interested in followed by the phrase “group” or “forum” and “used curriculum.” If your child is taking an outside class, ask the instructor if materials from the previous year will be used and if s/he will help you purchase them from last year’s participants.
Ebay and Half.com
When purchasing from any used source, make sure you are getting the copyright date you want. Again, if the listing isn’t clear, make sure to ask the seller. I’ve had a good experience buying from eBay because most sellers are homeschoolers themselves. Half.com is an extension of eBay and is a better option for finding single books than it is for complete curricula. Best Homeschool Buys has a list of eBay curriculum by publisher with explanations and links to reviews. This is a great place to start your eBay search.
HomeschoolBooksForLess
Homeschoolbooksforless sells used curriculum on consignment and also donates curriculum to missionaries and needy families. I have not purchased from them, but it might be an option to consider for you.
HomeschoolClassifieds
HomeschoolClassifieds, while not having the clearest user interface, offers excellent prices on used curriculum–typically with postage included. Listing fees are free or very inexpensive which means the seller can offer materials at low cost to you.
Homeschool Trader
Homeschool Trader is a new face in the used homeschool market, but they have a really clean interface. You can often get great deals on newer sites like this one.
Homeschool Tree
Homeschool Tree is another new entry into the used curriculum marketplace. I’m most interested in their future notifications of users when a curriculum they want is listed.
Google + Curriculum Classifieds Community
Curriculum Classifieds offers the buyer more of a personal touch because of Google+’s public information on sellers.
Facebook
Joining this Facebook group allows you to buy used curriculum with less anonymity than other forums.
Homeschoolers are listing popular curriculum like Abeka and My Father’s World on Craigslist. The advantage is you can see the quality of the materials before you buy and don’t have to pay shipping. The disadvantage is you may have to trek across town to someone’s home that you don’t know. You have the same disadvantage with Freecycle, coupled with the difficulty in requesting or picking up the materials before someone else does.
Vegsource
I haven’t used Vegsource personally, but it’s a popular place to purchase used curriculum. Links to used resources by grade level are on the right of the website.
Create a “Want to Buy” Listing
Many of the above resources allow you to create a wish list of curriculum. Don’t neglect to post this on other social media you participate in, even listing the price you want if that’s important.
Paperbackswap
You’re unlikely to get current or complete curriculum at Paperbackswap, but you may get some valuable books here for the price of shipping a book of your own. I’ve gotten workbooks, many classics, and science experiment books here. Because books are not to be written in, you can feel pretty comfortable that the workbooks will be appropriate. If not, contact the “seller” and ask for a credit to be returned. Note: Paperbackswap now charges a yearly membership fee to participate.
The Book Samaritan
If your family is really in need and you don’t need curriculum from a specific publisher, consider the Book Samaritan. You only need to send a request with the grade levels of your children and agree not to sell the curriculum when you are finished with it.
Yellow House Book Rental
Renting curriculum for 10 months is another great option. Yellow House Book Rental supplies this option and others on this list to make homeschooling affordable for families.
Home 4 School Books
Jennifer shares her new site that offers used books at reasonable prices. You can find it at Discount Homeschool Book.com.
Maybe you’d like to finance your curriculum purchases for next year by selling this year’s curriculum? Maybe you just want to be able to find the dining room table for a change? Then selling or donating your used curriculum is a great idea. The same places you will find used curriculum are also good places to sell or donate it.
Your Local Support Group
You might consider listing your “for sale” items via your support group’s online forum or group. Make sure to abide by the rules. Before you sell or donate elsewhere, you may want to check any “Want to Buy” listings other members have posted. I have a couple of boxes of materials that are being donated to my support group’s curriculum library.
A Local Used Curriculum Sale
Again, determine the most successful sale in your area. Calculate the time you have to invest in working the sale and any expenses before deciding that this is the option for you. I haven’t made much for my time at used sales in the past, but I’ve enjoyed chatting with friends and have gotten good deals from other sellers.
A Local Bookstore or Library that has Materials on Consignment
Find out what the policies on consignment are and ask others who have used the particular site you’re interested in. Recognize that stores that price materials for you may under or over-estimate prices which could affect your return. It’s most important to find out how long they will keep your materials and what they will do with items that don’t sell. Calculate time required to complete any paperwork (some stores require a detailed accounting of each item) and the percentage the store will keep before consigning.
Amazon
Because Amazon is the first place I look for used books, I decided to try selling my used curriculum through them this year. Because my time is most valuable to me, I also decided to let Amazon fulfill my orders. What that means is that I input all my materials into their system, together with the prices I want them at, and then shipped them all to Amazon’s warehouse. Now when someone buys one of my used books, Amazon will ship it to them. My work is done. In a month’s time, I cleared $500 and have very few things left. To see my used curriculum, click on my Booksmark Amazon seller page. In the same period of time, I have not sold any items I listed elsewhere. I highly recommend Amazon for selling used curriculum.
User Groups
List your curriculum on forums or online groups that are associated with the curriculum or approach you use. An advantage is marketing your stuff to the people most interested in it. A disadvantage is that you will have to arrange payment and shipping with people you usually don’t know. If your child took an outside class, ask the instructor if s/he is using the same books and if s/he would be willing to help sell it to next year’s students.
Ebay and Half.com
Ebay seems to be more popular for used curriculum than half.com. If you choose to auction your materials, you may make much more or much less than you expect. If you don’t like that uncertainty, list your materials using Buy It Now. Payment for materials is more secure if you use PayPal, but you will still have to handle shipping.
HomeschoolBooksForLess
Homeschoolbooksforless also accepts materials on consignment. Be sure to read their policies before choosing to consign there. I have no experience with them and would love to hear if you do!
HomeschoolClassifieds
HomeschoolClassifieds‘ biggest advantage is the low or no listing fees. I have sold a number of items through them. The disadvantage is a cluttered home page and slow communication with buyers at times. Again, you will have to ship items. If you list as “postage paid,” you need to make sure you are allowing enough money to cover costs.
Homeschool Trader
Homeschool Trader is a newer option for sellers, but the site makes it really easy to enter your items. You’re likely to get a lot of views of your materials because there are fewer sellers to begin with.
Homeschool Tree
Homeschool Tree is another new entry into the used curriculum marketplace. I’m most interested in their future app to make listing products easy.
Curriculum Classifieds also boosts sellers’ confidence as you can “see” who is purchasing from you.
Facebook
When you join this Facebook group you will also have a little more information about who is purchasing your curriculum.
I have not sold curriculum on Craigslist, but I seriously considered it this year. The disadvantage is having to be home for buyers who may not show up or may not want your curriculum once they see it. The advantage is you don’t have to ship. Can you tell that I hate shipping things? Freecyle is another option for donating curriculum, but I would be concerned that someone is snatching up your charity only to resell it.
Vegsource
Vegsource has been recommended to me as a seller, but I haven’t used it. Please comment if you’ve used it!
Paperbackswap
Many homeschoolers use Paperbackswap and are on waiting lists for curriculum books. You can list them here and ship them to members when requested. You might even get a personal thank you! In exchange, you will receive credit in books. Be aware that you can sell your credits if you’d rather not be paid in more books.
The Book Samaritan
The Book Samaritan accepts donations for needy families. Please read their submission guidelines before shipping.
You can drop off your books at Goodwill or a charity book sale. The YMCA has a huge book sale in our area. You can also have charities come by and pick up your books in many cities. I like to donate regular books to charity, but not homeschool curriculum. Why? Because I know homeschoolers will have a hard time finding it. That’s why I don’t recommend looking at Goodwill for curriculum. Supplementary books, yes. Abeka or Sonlight, no.
Home educators have a lot of demands on their time. We may have multiple children, some of whom are babies or toddlers who require extra care. Some of our children may be teens who aren’t yet driving, yet are involved in numerous outside classes or activities. Then there are homeschooling parents who have a home-based businesses or work outside the home. We want to teach our children well, but we wonder:
Is there a way of providing a quality education in less time?
Some homeschoolers think so. The idea is that you teach the essential material in just one hour a day, leaving the rest of the time for the children to do independent work, related assignments, or pursue their own interests in an unschooling approach.
What Would an Hour a Day Homeschool Look Like?
Teach one subject or do memory work for six subjects, ten minutes each
Teach four subjects (math, language arts, Bible, read aloud) for four subjects, fifteen minutes each
Teach two subjects (math, language arts) for thirty minutes each; these could be switched out daily
Teach one subject for an hour each day on a rotation
Teach an hour for older students and an hour for youngers
Teach for more than one hour using any combination above
Teach this way when you’re pressed for time
I have used the latter approach many, many times. A repair person comes, the phone rings, I have to pick someone up from the airport–you name it–and the time I have left for teaching is down to an hour. I often use the ten-minute per subject approach. Most of the time I teach for three hours using a combination of approaches. I have six children, some of whom require more intensive instruction in reading. As they mature, less of my time will be required.
But Don’t Students Need More of Your Time?
Yes, they often do. That’s why every teacher who uses this method must make themselves available to tutor and answer questions. You may be spending only an hour of focused time “teaching” your students, but they will be spending many hours relying on your tutoring and learning on their own.
Want More Information About Homeschooling in an Hour?
Check out Homeschooling-Ideas and Homeschool.com that reference a father whose six children were homeschooled in an hour a day and attended Stanford. He notes that he used this approach with older children.
You can cover many of the essentials in LESS than an hour a day with Classical Conversations.
What Do You Think? Could You Homeschool in an Hour a Day?
I’m a Christian psychologist turned homeschooling mother of six. My life can be a little crazy, so I look for sanity-saving ideas to use and share. I hope you’ll read my About page to learn more.
