This week I tested the ability of Nick Jehlen’s Guilt Hour, as described on Lifehacker to help me get things done. I did not work with a team, nor did I plan to use a one-hour time slot a week, but four 15-minute guilt-attacking periods. Scroll to the end of this post for a full description of my test.
How the Guilt Hour Saved My Sanity This Week
Helped me realize how guilty I feel. This may have been the worst week for me to test this approach because I was playing catch-up from the week before when I had many scheduled commitments. I felt guilty about putting things off, especially when people started asking me about them. Thinking about doing what I feel most guilty about made me realize that there aren’t many things I don’t feel guilty about. That’s an important piece of my productivity pie.
Encouraged me to spend quality time with my kids. Maybe my kids are reading this blog, because two of them asked me to spend individual time with them this week and I couldn’t refuse. Of course, I feel guilty about not having individual time with the kids. My son asked to use a gift card he’d gotten for his birthday, so we went out for a great dinner together. I’ve already seen improvement in his attitude as a result. My daughter asked for a girl’s night which she planned so many activities for, it ended up being a girl’s DAY, too. When all is said and done, no one will remember that I got buttons stitched on, woodwork cleaned, or a blog plugin installed. But my kids will remember their time with mom.
How the Guilt Hour Made Me Crazy This Week
Too much I feel guilty about. I felt very overwhelmed trying to decide which guilty tasks to focus on–especially because I felt guilty enough just trying to dig my way out of last week’s backlog.
Vague time commitment. I hadn’t scheduled time to do this. I just knew that I would be doing four 15-minute periods. But after spending almost an entire day and night with my kids, I didn’t feel like I could afford to spend more time on the Guilt Hour. That made me feel–you guessed it!–guilty.
Tapped into my procrastination issues. I’ve discovered that guilt and procrastination are a vicious cycle. It really doesn’t matter which I start with (guilt or procrastination), because I’m in trouble either way. I need more than a guilt hour to get me to tackle some of these tasks, I’m afraid. The little-and-often approach of SMEMA from last week might help. Maybe I needed the support of other people tackling their guilt-producing tasks, too.
Did the Guilt Hour Help Me Get More Done?
In general, NO. I invested time in my children which is extremely important to me, but in terms of getting things–even just guilt-laden tasks–done, it did not work for me. It’s possible this was a bad week, that scheduling it as a complete hour, and getting support might help. But for now, it’s not something I plan to continue.
**UPDATE**
Unsurprisingly, I still do not use a Guilt Hour and avoid feeling guilty about tasks. Instead, I take Sundays off completely to do ONLY what I want to do (aside from family, friend, and church commitments). This works much better for me.
The Productivity Approach I’ll Be Using for Week 7
Jason Womack believes that envisioning your ideal day is the best way to make it happen. He spends 15 minutes a day picturing how he’d like the next 24 hours to go.
The concept. By imagining how you’d like your day to unfold, you’re reviewing your goals, your tasks, and your time in a realistic way. After all, no one’s ideal day is working at an intense pace for 24 hours with no breaks. A friend mentioned that she was going to use SMEMA in conjunction with envisioning her ideal day and I thought that was a great idea. I’m not committed to spending a full 15 minutes, but I will do this every day this week in written form using idonethis. I have my idonethis email sent to me in the morning, so I can email my ideal day to idonethis in the morning and write back in the evening with what my day was actually like.
If you’d like to join me this week, here’s what you do. Read Jason’s description of how he envisions his ideal day. Decide if you’ll record it and follow up like I am or will just dream it. Check out idonethis if you’re interested in recording your ideal day. It’s free.
Click here to see how envisioning my ideal day worked for me.
If you’ve tried the Guilt Hour to increase your productivity, please vote in the poll below.
Here are the links to the productivity hacks I’ve tried so far:
I’ve found so much hot homeschooling stuff this week that I had to save some of it for next week! Thanks so much for the link-ups. Please keep sharing the great ideas! Click the titles of the articles that interest you and leave a comment for the blogger or share these sanity savers with other homeschoolers.
I’ve never been much of a St. Pat’s fan. But the winter has been extending its stay into spring and my kids need a day of refreshing fun. So I’ll be going green for a day. How about you? Nicole of Mama of Many Blessings shares a great lineup of ideas for us.
Are you heading to a homeschool convention this spring or summer? I’ve been going for so many years and I still get excited. Heather Bowen shares some great advice at Homeschool Village for getting the most out of a convention and the coolest thing ever–a printable to help you stay organized. I’m so using this!
It’s wonderful to be able to homeschool in every room of your house. What isn’t as wonderful is having every room of your house LOOK like a school room. Stacey at Layered Soul has some real life examples for keeping your stuff accessible, but out of sight.
Carol Anne’s post at Confessions of a Fraidy Cat really touched me because she shares the emotions so many mothers have when they wonder if there’s something different about their child.
I found this great website for educational downloads and was inspired by how one teacher used her materials. From the newsletter: “Meet this week’s Featured Teacher, Jodi Southard. Jodi has raised over $10,000 through her TpT store to contribute toward covering the medical expenses of a young child, a sibling of one of her students, who needs a heart transplant. Twenty-one generous TpT Sellers supported her efforts by donating products toward her drive. She raised the money in about a week.
Speaking of downloads, Felicia at Princess and the Rock has some great worksheets and a game that will keep your kids interested in writing this week. If you have any to link up, please share them with her.
Now link up what’s hot on your homeschool blog this week!
Please grab the What’s Hot button from the right footer of Psychowith6 or link to this post. Visit at least one another link. Thanks so much for sharing.
I often feel guilty praying little prayers. I have friends right now who need great big prayers. They’re in pain. They’re in mourning. They need a job in the worst way. Do I have any business praying for the rain to stop so my hair doesn’t get wet?
Praying for Dresses and Parking Spaces
Graduate school had been a harrowing time for me. In So You’re Not Wonder Woman, I share some of the many challenges I faced: impending failure, unbearable living conditions (that I’d created), credit card debt, overeating, unhealthy relationships, and depression. I was so thankful to have emerged from that time with a Ph.D. that I wanted a special dress to celebrate. I wasn’t willing to spend a lot on it and it had to be just right. But my shopping had been to no avail. I had to have a dress before the stores closed that night or I would have to wear something I’d worn many times before. I prayed that if the Lord wanted me to have a new dress for graduation, that I would find it at this last store at the right price. I walked into the store and saw it immediately. As I reached to take it off the rack, a sales clerk stopped me and said, “Wait! We’re marking that down.” I not only got the perfect dress inexpensively, I got the idea that it was okay to pray little prayers.
I’ve written before about God answering prayers for parking spaces and beautiful weather for weddings because God is a Gentleman. But I keep forgetting that fact and feel like I’m being a spoiled brat whining at God’s feet when I pray little prayers. This weekend I remembered why you and I have permission to pray them.
The Rain that Wasn’t a Pain
Saturday morning I was getting ready for the annual Women’s Day of Renewal where I would speak on “Secrets of the Spirit Lifters.” I had my hair sufficiently poofed up, but it would be no match for the rain that was coming down. I asked my husband if we had any umbrellas I could take with me. He thought maybe there was one in the garage. Nope! I was pretty sure they were all in our family van which I was not taking to the retreat and which would require me to take on a lot of rain to get to. I decided to jump in the other vehicle and take my chances not having an umbrella.
On the way to the retreat, I realized I didn’t even have a jacket to cover my head. I was NOT thinking about encouraging the women; I was thinking about keeping my hair dry! I decided to pray.
Lord, if you would stop the rain long enough for me to get into the church, I would be so appreciative! Please bless this retreat and make it the best one yet.
I’m going to be completely honest and admit that I didn’t expect Him to hold off the rain–especially as I turned up my wiper speed as high as it would go on the drive there. But I did relax knowing that God would help me, one way or another. I sang along to the praise music on my radio until my exit was in sight. The rain suddenly stopped. The little drops stopped landing on my windshield and threatened to slide down my cheeks.
I was able to get into the church with my materials dry and my hair held high. But nothing could have been higher than my spirits. God cares about dresses and parking spaces and dry hair because He cares about me and you. He seems even bigger when He answers our little prayers.
As I left the retreat I asked one of the organizers how it had gone and she answered, “It was our best one yet.”
And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Matthew 10:30
Has God answered your little prayers and renewed your faith?
Effective in delaying gratification. I’m convinced that this is my biggest productivity problem. When I feel like checking email, researching a topic online, or chatting on the phone, I just do it–even if that is NOT how I should be spending my time. Once I recorded the tasks that I wanted and needed to do, I immediately felt resistance. I think this is because of the perceived obligation I’ve written about before. I talked myself into delaying the tasks I suddenly wanted to do more than the ones I’d written down by saying, “You can do as little as you want on the first two tasks and then you can add two more tasks you really want to do.” I don’t believe I’ve ever found a reward more motivating for me than the opportunity to add new tasks! I knew I could pick absolutely anything which gave me a sense of control that I loved.
Eliminated overwhelm. I used my weekly planner to get a sense of everything I had to do for the week, but other than looking at my “must do” tasks for a given day (of which there were few), I had a maximum of three tasks in front of me at any given time. I no longer felt like I was buried in things I should be doing. What’s more, I added to this feeling of being on top of my tasks by refusing to add anything to my IQTell list that I couldn’t remember to do naturally.
Gave me a sense of completion. When I went to bed, my list was complete. That’s a feeling I’ve only had before by putting tasks off so they weren’t due today. I’m someone who has very few opportunities to experience completion so this was wonderful.
How SMEMA Made Me Crazy This Week
The Mark Forster forum shenanigans. I won’t go into detail, but there were some problems on the forum that were pretty frustrating. I can go a bit off course when I focus on what other users say is the best way to use an approach, too. The purpose of A Year of Living Productively is for me to find productivity hacks that work for me, to share ideas, and enjoy discussions with others about what works for them. It’s not to win a debate. I have teens for that purpose, after all!
Task ordering. There were times when I wrote down that I would do a first task followed by a second. Then something came up which made it difficult or impossible to use that order. I made a new rule for myself that changing of the order (or even the tasks!) was allowed as long as I wasn’t doing it just to procrastinate or get to a more fun task.
Not being able to use it every day. I had several days this week when my time was completely scheduled. There’s no point to using SMEMA then, but on the other hand, there’s no point to using ANY productivity hack.
Did SMEMA Help Me Get More Done?
Without a doubt, YES. I plan to continue using it, and to think of it as strengthening my skills in delaying gratification. I’m hopeful that the accountability of writing this blog will help me continue. If it falls apart, I can certainly update this post to that effect.
**UPDATE**
I never use SMEMA now. The biggest reason why is because of the resistance I had to the ordering of tasks. I find that I need more flexibility to deal with tasks in the moment.
The Productivity Approach I’ll Be Using for Week 6
I read Nick Jehlen’s article on the Guilty Hour last month and knew I wanted to try it. I don’t mind having a backlog of things that I’d like to do, but I can’t stand feeling guilty about things I haven’t done.
The concept. Once a week, you work on the task you feel most guilty about for an hour. You can help someone with one of their guilt-producing tasks or vice versa, but because I don’t work with a team, I’ll be dealing with my own guilty tasks. I could spend an hour on one day this week on a guilty task, but I don’t know that I would experience the power of the method that way. Instead, I will spend a minimum of 15 minutes 4 days in the upcoming week on the task(s) I feel most guilty about. If I find I want to keep working, I will. If I don’t, I won’t.
If you’d like to join me this week, here’s what you do. Read the article on Lifehacker. Decide if you’ll do one hour once this week (and when) or if you’ll break it up as I plan to do. Then get ready to go guiltless!
To see how the Guilt Hour worked for me, click here.
If you’ve tried SMEMA to increase your productivity, please vote in the poll below.
Here are the links to the productivity hacks I’ve tried so far:
This week, I have some great get-real articles for you and an opportunity for fellow homeschool bloggers to link up and share what’s hot on their own sites. I’ll highlight the best articles in next week’s issue. As always, click the article titles to read and if you love them, comment or share the hotness! God bless your homeschooling this week.
Elizabeth at the Hesitant Housewife offers no solutions. She admits, it’s just hard. Having homeschooled with five different toddlers around, I will tell you that’s the truth. Go ahead and try different approaches, but your best bet may be to hang on until the ride’s over.
In the same vein, Elizabeth shares an unretouched view of homeschooling on Hip Homechool Moms. I know you don’t think so now, but those photos will become your prized possessions.
Stick figure art is all the rage, and as an art underachiever, I couldn’t be more thrilled. I love the idea of kids creating stick figures to help them remember Scripture. Check it out at The Curriculum Choice. It’s on my list of Bible curriculum to explore for next year.
Whether you’ve read the book, seen the movie, or just plan to, Homegrown Learners has a neat unit study for you, complete with picture of the smiling owner of a project prize for completing it.
Dealing with physicians and other health professionals poses a unique set of challenges to homeschoolers. In short, it can be scary! Heather Laurie offers us an empowering perspective in this The Old Schoolhouse article.
Link up!
Have a hot article, tip, or resource to share? Please enter it below and either include my blog button or the link to this post in your own post or website. Please also visit at least one other link and thank them for the hot idea!
God bless your homeschooling this week!
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If you want your child’s attention, just get on the phone and they’ll appear in an instant with the latest whine or dispute for you to referee. Am I right? Unfortunately, misbehavior works to get our attention. Good behavior often doesn’t.
The Problem with Ignoring Good Behavior
Whatever is rewarded gets repeated. I’m a psychologist and I taught my clients this. But in my own home, I’ve struggled to use this principle. When the behavior is bad, I react. When my kids are good, I just want to celebrate. You know, by taking a nap. I’m not wanting to go out of my way to reward them.
While it’s inconvenient to reward and discipline, it’s vital that we do. That’s why I was ecstatic to find the Caught Being Good app for the iPhone. I have my iPhone on my person at all times (why is another story), so using it to reward good behavior is very convenient.
The idea behind Caught Being Good is that you look for the behavior you want (not what you don’t). Of course, misbehavior should have consequences! But the purpose of the app is to teach children WHAT to do rather than punish for doing something wrong. Verbal praise is a powerful reward, but using other rewards can make behavior change even more likely.
How Caught Being Good Works
If you’d like to watch a video of the app in action, check this out. If you prefer my incredible description to clicking over to YouTube, here goes. Anything your kids do that you like, you announce, “You’ve been caught being good!” or something to that effect. You then present them with your phone with the app open. They choose their name and spin the wheel. They’re then given a reward from among those you’ve pre-selected using a frequency you’ve chosen. If you can’t give the reward immediately, you can save it under their name for later.
Using this app with my kids has prompted them to make my bed for me numerous times, do chores without being asked, and to surrender a privileged seat or snack to a sibling. Some rewards I’ve included include choosing a snack or cereal from the store, being taken out for ice cream, or having a sleepover. Rewards I least want to give out (like sleepovers) I’ve set to occur least often. It’s taken some time to work out the right rewards. The kids have helped me by telling me which rewards are lame and which are occurring too seldom. Yes, they’ve complained about the sleepover.
Catch Your Kids Being Good
If you have an iPhone, you can download Caught Being Good in the app store for $.99. I’m not being paid a commission on it. (What’s wrong with this picture?) Set up an account for your kids (I’ve used it with my 16-year-old, too!) and add your rewards. I discourage you from announcing your intentions. Just surprise everyone by announcing at dinner that Junior’s been good by eating his broccoli without complaint. When the rest of the kids (and your hubby) chime in that they’ve been good, too, and also want a spin, explain that they can’t request spins. They have to be caught.
What if you don’t have an iPhone or don’t want to spend the money on the app? Make your own paper reward wheel using an old board game spinner or create a reward jar.
I’m a Christian psychologist turned homeschooling mother of six. My life can be a little crazy, so I look for sanity-saving ideas to use and share. I hope you’ll read my About page to learn more.
