One of the most common concerns I hear from new homeschoolers is whether or not they’re doing enough. If that’s your question, regardless of how long you’ve been homeschooling, I have six ways you can know that you’re doing enough in your homeschool.
#1 Know you’re doing enough in your homeschool by comparing your plans to policies
The first way to know if you’re doing enough in your homeschool is to compare your plans with your state or charter school’s policies. Many homeschoolers are surprised to learn how few guidelines there really are for what to teach. I recommend that you visit HSLDA (the Homeschool Legal Defense Organization). This website lists homeschooling laws by state and also has curriculum guidelines for high schoolers – another area that causes homeschoolers a great deal of anxiety.
If you are doing what the laws or guidelines suggest, you can take a deep breath and relax. The standards set by others are typically much lower than the standards we set for ourselves. I am not suggesting that we do the least amount possible. We want our kids to have a rich, quality education. But neither am I suggesting that we should do every subject and use multiple curricula and classes to teach these subjects. I am here to promote homeschool sanity, and that’s the quickest way to the homeschool loony bin. Instead, use the standards to reassure yourself that you are in fact doing enough.
#2 Know you’re doing enough by comparing your hours
The second way to know if you’re doing enough is to consider the number of hours you might spend on direct teaching by the age of your child. RaisingArrows.net says that formal homeschooling takes 30-45 minutes for kindergarten and first grade, 1.5-2 hours for second to fourth grade, 2-4 hours for 5th & 6th grade, and 4+ hours for 7th grade and up. That doesn’t sound like a lot, does it?
My state requires 1000 hours of instruction. Let’s have a reasonable view of what that means. It does not mean that I must stand at my whiteboard lecturing for a thousand hours a year. Public school teachers are not held to that standard. In fact, public schools operate a bit more like I did when I practiced as a clinical psychologist. A counseling hour was really 45 minutes with ten minutes of that taken up with greetings and good-byes. Traditional school students spend time using the restroom, walking the hallway, staring out the window…you get the idea. We also have an advantage over traditional teachers in that we can count many informal activities as educational hours. Have your kids help you make dinner and if you are teaching as you go, you have life skill hours. When your child is reading the manual to understand a new game or toy that has been purchased, you have reading time. If you are balking at the suggestion that reading manuals counts as educational time, know that Common Core standards introduced the idea that this type of reading was valuable for students. I agree, but I don’t think it should replace literature. As homeschoolers, it certainly doesn’t have to.
I homeschooled for many years before I understood that educational hours did not always have to involve me. Kids can read and work independently. They can take classes, participate in extracurricular activities, and even help teach siblings. Begin to expand your definition of education, and you will be more confident that you are doing enough.
#3 Know you’re doing enough by developing key skills
The third way you can know you’re doing enough is if you are spending time developing key skills. My previous point may have had you thinking about unschooling. If you’re interested in unschooling, I recommend my podcast interview with Karla Marie Williams. No matter how strictly you adhere to the unschooling philosophy, I believe it’s critical that we spend time developing key skills. Even if you don’t think your child needs to learn handwriting until middle school, Grandma may believe otherwise and give you a hard time. Your child may be thoroughly embarrassed if she doesn’t know her math facts while playing a game with friends. And while many children develop the ability to read later, it is critical that we spend time developing phonics and fluid reading skills in our students. You may choose to develop reading, handwriting, and math knowledge in whichever way you choose. Have your child use games to learn phonics. Use online programs like Starfall for reading. Or use a book like Teach Your Child to Read in 100 Easy Lessons. Whatever you choose, reading instruction is not optional in my opinion.
Handwriting too is an essential skill. I’ve learned over the years of homeschooling five boys that slow handwriting results in reluctance to do any type of seatwork. In fact, even math homework can be a struggle if kids are not able to write their numerals quickly. Choose the handwriting approach that works for you. Teach your kids to form the letters by writing in Cool Whip, use the handwriting app on your iPad, or use formal curriculum like Handwriting Without Tears. Whatever you do, have your child practice for short periods and consistently.
The next area that I believe is critical for our students to learn is math facts. Some homeschoolers have told me that they don’t believe learning math facts is important in the age of calculators. I couldn’t disagree more. Have you ever made a mistake with calculators? I do it all the time. When I am totaling my sales at conventions and I am told that I had $300,000 in sales, I am not hooting and hollering. Instead, I groan and know that I have to re-calculate. If your kids don’t know math facts, higher level math will be impossible. Without memorizing basic math facts, your child will be that cashier who panics when the cash register doesn’t tell her how much change to give you back. Again, you choose how to have your child master math facts. Use flashcards, stories, games, or competition to complete math fact quizzes in a short period of time as is taught by Learn Math Fast. But make the acquisition of math facts a priority in your homeschool.
#4 Know you’re doing enough by covering some subjects every other year
The fourth way to know if you’re doing enough is you are covering subject areas like social studies, science, and fine arts at least every other year. One of the mistakes I made as a beginning homeschooler is I thought I had to teach every conceivable subject every year. That is a recipe for homeschool burnout. Public schools do not teach calligraphy, map memorization, and astronomy, in addition to all the core subjects they have to cover to meet standards.
If you want to study one or more of these things, make room for it in your homeschool schedule. I love history. But I didn’t realize that I was not required to teach it every single year. The same with science. These subjects and even fine arts will be a part of your homeschool education even if they are not a specific focus. Field trips we have taken almost always incorporate history. My kids did science experiments of their own for fun. In the YouTube age, that’s even more likely. And art and music appreciation can be incorporated into a fun Friday rather than being a specific course.
I know, I know. I want to do it all too. And we we can do a lot. Just not all this year. Just not all this week. If you’re struggling to determine which curriculum to use, I recommend that you read the article I wrote on curriculum paralysis.
#5 Know you’re doing enough if you’re reading a lot
The fifth way to know you’re doing enough is that you and your kids are reading a lot. Reading is the gold standard for education. In truth, we can teach our kids all the other subject areas with reading alone. Sure, mapping, experiments, and writing are important too. But primary education is to be found in books.
I learned best by reading. In fact, my teen son asked me while I was cutting his hair how I had learned to cut hair. I explained that I found a very old book at a used book sale and that was all I needed. If your child is not a verbal learner, audiobooks can be a huge help. I have spoken before about the benefits of audiobooks and reading aloud for building vocabulary.
If you are in a challenging time in your homeschool because you’re pregnant, traveling, or caring for an ill family member, focus on reading. It will be enough.
#6 Know you’re doing enough by talking to veteran homeschoolers
The final way to know you’re doing enough is to talk to veteran homeschoolers. I laughed so hard when my new homeschooling friend was worried that her son wasn’t willing to follow her plan. Of course he wasn’t. It was too much and I empathetically told her so.
Sure, there are homeschoolers online who present their homeschools as though they’re reading a novel or two aloud to their family each day, reenacting a new war every weekend, and building a life-sized model of the ark this month. But most homeschoolers will be honest about what they are able to accomplish. I trust the members of The Homeschool Sanity Circle on Facebook to be real with you. They will read your plan and will tell you if you’re doing enough or more likely that you’re trying to take on too much.
Conclusion
In conclusion, if you are following your state’s or charter school’s guidelines, spending a reasonable number of hours on school for your kids’ ages, teaching key skills, covering other subject areas at least every other year, reading a lot, and you’ve gotten the green light from veteran homeschoolers, you can rest assured that you’re doing enough.
When I first became a stay-at-home mom, I lived in sweats and PJs. Until I discovered FLYLady, I didn’t realize that my wardrobe was having a major impact on my productivity and self-esteem. With FLYLady’s help, getting dressed to shoes became a part of my morning routine. But even though I found the key to organizing my homeschool life in routines and 15-minute missions, I quit dressing for homeschool success. My homeschool mom fashion formula was yoga pants and workout tops. Disastrous? Hardly. But when I began wearing pretty clothes again last fall because of Get Your Pretty On (GYPO), many areas of my life improved, including homeschooling. Here’s how it can make a difference in your life too.
GYPO is like a wardrobe menu planning service. You receive a shopping list of wardrobe pieces, not the clothing itself. There are lists of basics for stay-at-home moms and seasonal lists with trendier pieces added to the basics. With the shopping list, you are given a month’s worth of outfits that can be put together from the list. Here’s why I think you’ll love Get Your Pretty On as a homeschooling mom.
Get Your Pretty On (aka GYPO) can make you feel pretty.
Before GYPO, I saved my nice clothes for special occasions like I saved my “good dishes.” I figured it didn’t matter. I’m a homeschool mom after all. But then I tried GYPO when I saw a friend doing it on Instagram. One morning I awoke feeling very low in energy. I put on my outfit of the day and suddenly I felt great!
Recently, a male friend of ours was over and asked where I was going looking so nice. My husband said, “She looks like that every day,” and I couldn’t argue with him. Wearing outfits that are flattering makes me feel pretty, confident, and energized and I want every homeschool mom to feel this way.
GYPO saves you money.
Before GYPO, I bought all kinds of trendy pieces that didn’t go with anything I had. I still felt like I had “nothing to wear,” so I was likely to shop for more. Now I shop for just a few new seasonal items that mix and match with the basics I already own. Knowing exactly what to buy is like shopping from a grocery list; you buy less! You’ll discover a number of great pieces in your closet that will work with your wardrobe, and you’ll finally know how to wear them. If you love shopping the thrift stores, GYPO is the list that will narrow your search. GYPO has given me a new passion for thrifting. My favorite find was a new-with-tags $165 dress for $5.
GYPO also saves you time.
Homeschooling moms are busy. With GYPO I don’t have to figure out what to wear every day because I have a calendar of outfits. I was amazed by how easy it was to pack for overnight trips when my outfits had already been planned for me. It’s so much quicker to choose items to give away, too. You know they don’t look as good as your GYPO wardrobe pieces and they don’t go with anything!
GYPO builds friendships.
When you purchase a wardrobe capsule, you are given access to a private Facebook group. Women (many of them homeschooling moms) share pictures of their outfits of the day there. There are women of all ages, shapes, and sizes, and they’re all so nice. Members share about their personal lives and give style and shopping advice. I’m very picky about Facebook groups because I can’t stand drama. The GYPO group I was in was wonderful and I think I know why. The creator of GYPO, Alison Lumbatis, is a member of the group and is humble, genuine, and loves to encourage women. Be sure to listen to my interview with her.
GYPO is good self-care.
I have told my husband and kids numerous times that dressing in my GYPO outfits makes me happy. They know it does. And as I’ve said before, our husbands and kids want us to be happy more than anything. When we’re happy, we are better wives, mothers, and teachers. Taking care of our appearance often leads women to eat better, exercise, address depression, and work toward meaningful goals. We also model a healthy approach to parenting for our daughters when we make our personal needs a priority.
A bonus reason to dress in pretty clothes is you don’t have to panic that the UPS guy will see you in your pajamas at 3 p.m. You’ll be ready for anything!
Find the latest capsule wardrobes here. I would love to have you join me in dressing for homeschool success. Have questions about GYPO? Comment below and I’m happy to respond.
Are you great at making plans for the school year but you never seem to do what you’ve planned? Or are you great at setting goals for the new year that you struggle to achieve? If that’s you, I’m going to put my psychologist hat on and explain why your follow-through fails.
One of my friends mentioned that she is a great planner. She has a great time taking her goals and planning them out in her planner in detail. She is so excited about her plans. She tells her family and friends about them. She believes she will succeed. And then the plans she has spent time crafting, the plans she was positively giddy about, never get beyond her planner. Why is that, she asked me? Why do her plans so often remain in the planner where she put them and never become reality?
If you can relate to my friend, know that I can too. I’ve left so many plans and goals in the planner cemetery. I wanted to know why I did that and how I could carry out my plans and achieve my goals. So I started doing some research. Then I did some experimenting. I learned there are three reasons we fail to follow through with our plans and goals.
Planning reduces anxiety
The first reason we fail to follow through was a surprise to me. Let’s say the new school year is upon you and you’re stressed. You don’t have anything ready. So you collect your books and grab your lesson planner and you start planning. Before long, you have several weeks planned. Ahh! Doesn’t that feel better?
Or let’s say that you haven’t been working out much this fall. As a result, your weight has increased. That makes you nervous because you have diabetes in your family. And you’re not that old. You know that if you don’t deal with eating and exercise now, you could have a serious problem later. So you talk with your husband about it and you agree that you’ll give one another the gift of a gym membership for Christmas. Yes! You ask for a new pair of running shoes too. Now you don’t need to worry about your health, right?
The problem is that sometimes when we make plans, set goals, or even take a small step toward achieving them, the anxiety that drove us to plan in the first place is greatly decreased. Research shows that in our minds, planning our goal is like actually achieving it. It’s handled, so we don’t need to think about it again.
When another homeschool commitment comes up that really needs to be arranged in your schedule, you don’t worry about it because you’ve already done some planning. But then things get real and your plan isn’t working. You stop using your lesson plans. Or it’s the holidays and you know you should work out and eat healthfully but you tell yourself that your gym membership in January will take care of it all.
Should we avoid planning to keep our anxiety high then? No, but there is a way we can stay motivated once we’ve planned. I’ll share that in next week’s post. In the meantime, I recommend reading How to Keep the Happy Planning Going.
Our subconscious is on to us
The second reason we fail to follow through with our plans is our subconscious knows the real reason we’ve made our plans and it’s not a good enough reason to do the work required.
So you planned lessons using two different science curriculum because you couldn’t decide which one to use AND you know that some of the best homeschoolers say that one curriculum isn’t enough. You really admire these homeschoolers whose kids got full-ride scholarships. You also scheduled one read aloud a week regardless of how long they are, simply because you want to read a lot of great books this year–like the ones you meant to read last year.
But your subconscious is thinking, “Really? Like that’s going to happen.” We can ignore our subconscious for a while, but as soon as we get through a week or two of school and get nowhere near everything done, our subconscious behaves like a homeschool hater. “You may as will give this up,” she mocks. And so we do, even though we don’t acknowledge that we aren’t being realistic in trying to be awesome homeschoolers. By the time we acknowledge that we aren’t following through with our plans, we’re more likely to tell ourselves that we’re losers than see that no homeschooler could do everything we planned.
When it comes to fitness, if one of the real reasons you wanted to set a fitness goal is because you know you’re going to see your super fit relative over the holidays, you aren’t likely to follow through. You’ll see her and say, “Yeah, so we got ourselves a gym membership for Christmas.” She’ll be enthusiastic. “That’s great! Good for you,” she’ll say. And you’ve accomplished your goal as far as your subconscious is concerned. No need to sweat it until next year when you see her. You can join a different gym then.
If you aren’t following through, there’s a good chance your “why” for your plans or goals is weak. Next time I’ll share strategies for keeping a strong why.
You don’t know how you work best
The third reason you aren’t following through is you don’t know how you work best. Some of the homeschool bloggers you follow have their kids start school by 7 a.m. It works for them, so you’ve been trying that. But you’re a family of night owls. Every time you try to get the kids up in the morning, it’s a battle. They’re tired and you’re cranky. Once you start, the kids sit and stare into space, falling asleep during your great read aloud. You’ve tried letting them get up much later, but that doesn’t really seem to work either. You have no idea how to get it all done without being mad at your kids and yourself.
And that’s just the beginning. You don’t know if you should be a year-round homeschooler, a textbook homeschooler, or a co-op homeschooler. Do you have time to work, blog, or start a business too? It sure doesn’t seem like it, though your finances could certainly benefit from the extra income.
Your super fit relative gets up early to work out. It gives her energy, she says. But you are so exhausted from staying up late and exercising early that you just want to crawl into bed and skip school. You’re just not the exercising type, you decide, and the fitness goal is forgotten.
You don’t know how you work best because you’ve been trying to make what other people do fit you. I did this for years in my homeschooling. I wondered what was wrong with me and my kids.
I also did it in my efforts to blog and write books. I thought I was a loser who wasn’t cut out for writing because I couldn’t make other people’s approaches work for me. And then I tried something new. Instead of continuing to force myself to use other people’s methods, I started experimenting. In 2013, I tried a new method to help me follow through and be productive every week. In the process, I found some things that worked brilliantly and discovered others that people raved about that didn’t work well for me at all.
At the end of that year, I felt like I understood better how I worked best. I planned to write a book about my experiments and share the secret to getting more done. But months went by. And then years. And I still hadn’t written the book. During that time, however, I learned more about how I can get more done. In fact, I started becoming more productive than I’ve ever been. In fact, in addition to homeschooling and podcasting, I published The Organized Homeschool Life book and planner and three volumes of Grammar Galaxy language arts curriculum. I began speaking at homeschool conferences and running a business while still having time for my family and several hobbies.
At the beginning of my year of experimentation, I thought I would be telling people the best strategies for getting more done and following through with their plans. But five years after finishing the experiments, I understood that the most powerful strategy is to learn how you work best. I finally felt ready to write a book about others could discover their unique productivity formula like I did. It’s going to be available to you next week when we talk about how you can get more done in 2019.
But if you can’t wait until then to develop your own method of following through, you can download a free sample of the book, A Year of Living Productively, that will get you started. Click the book cover above for your free sample and productivity updates.
Next time I’ll explain how I overcome these three obstacles to follow-through to be the most productive (and happy) I’ve ever been. Talk to you then.
What’s your biggest struggle with follow through? Comment and let me know.
I didn’t intend to homeschool. I had a Ph.D. in psychology and I planned to practice part-time and be home with my young children the rest of the time. But then I started homeschooling. I found a way out of the CHAOS through FLYLady and routines, and eventually found that I loved it. Surprised, I found it was a fulfilling career. But as I came to love homeschooling, legalism threatened to destroy it. Here’s how.
Even though I hadn’t wanted to homeschool and only did it at what I believed was the Lord’s urging, I found myself wondering why everyone wasn’t doing it. Scratch that. I found myself judging other Christians for not homeschooling.
It was clearly what God meant in Deuteronomy 6:7, wasn’t it? That’s what so many speakers at Christian homeschool conferences said. It was like the 11th commandment. So why wouldn’t loving Christian parents stay home to make sure their children were raised in the faith? Yes, I knew people who sent their kids to Christian schools. But you couldn’t be too sure what teachers would teach, and you certainly couldn’t be sure of the influence the other kids in the school would have.
My husband and I had a community of like-minded homeschooling friends. When we heard stories of Christian kids gone bad, we trusted in the admonitions of Christian homeschool speakers and authors who served as mentors. If we would keep our children out of Sunday school, youth groups, and the dating scene; if we would keep them from summer camps with public school kids; if we would keep them from reading the books, listening to the music, and watching the movies that other kids did, our kids wouldn’t be like those other kids. They would be better.
If we followed the Christian homeschool plan for our families, we could rest easy that our kids would be Christians (many of them pastors and missionaries) who wouldn’t have premarital sex, wouldn’t have a substance abuse problem, wouldn’t end up living in our basements at 30, and wouldn’t reject us. That was the plan, and we felt great about it.
My husband and I frequently talked about families who weren’t following the Christian homeschool plan like we were. Many of them already had problematic children. We shook our heads with a tsk-tsk. They should have homeschooled or homeschooled the right way.
The homeschool plan failed
Our homeschool went smoothly for years. The kids were agreeable to our plans for them. They would complete a college degree while in high school. They would graduate early without debt or the negative influence of college. They would begin dating when they were ready to marry. Our kids would homeschool their kids.
And then my oldest, a smart, strong-willed child, entered puberty.
I don’t have to tell you what happened next, because you won’t be surprised. Yes, he rebelled against everything. Everything. He wanted to go to college far from home and visit us once or twice a year. He wasn’t sure about the Bible and he didn’t agree with our politics. He wanted a girlfriend in junior high. He became defiant and disobeyed us frequently.
Another homeschooling mom we had just become acquainted with talked to me about his behavior. Underlying every word she said was her judgment:
“You’re not homeschooling the right way.”
I was devastated. I didn’t see the irony at the time, nor did I recognize the truth: I wasn’t homeschooling the right way.
Through many tears, we and our son realized that we were terrified and were acting out of those fears. We were afraid our son would reject the faith, our family, and everything we believed in. He was afraid that if he didn’t see things our way that we would stop loving him.
By the time our oldest asked to go to school, he had become less oppositional. We knew that this was God’s calling for him, and we agreed to it.
But the damage had been done. Here’s what I mean: our oldest son had made our legalism clear. We cared more about our homeschool plan and looking good as parents than we did about him, than we did about our other children, than we did about Jesus. Our son’s period of acting out (which he later related to hormones) tore down our idol of homeschooling. We are so grateful.
What homeschooling without legalism looks like
The first change I noticed when we left homeschool legalism was far less judgment of others. We stopped talking about how this or that family was allowing a teenager to date. We prayed more compassionately for those whose children were struggling. We gave advice less and listened more.
The second change I noticed was far less judgment of ourselves. A legalistic homeschool is very tough to maintain. Everyone has to do good and look good because when they don’t, the parents (as the homeschool leaders) are to blame. Bad behavior led to fear which led to anger. We started taking ourselves less seriously.
The third change I noticed was a shift in responsibility. We had felt entirely responsible for how our kids “turned out.” We came to recognize that we took ownership of responsibilities that were rightly God’s and our children’s. Ultimately, we realized that we couldn’t homeschool our kids into the faith and godly living.
Is Leaving Legalism for you?
What’s funny is that at one time I would have believed it was my responsibility to help you leave legalism. I now know that if God is calling you out of legalism, He is far more effective at that than I could ever be. If the Lord brought you to this page, I do want to suggest that you read the book Leaving Legalism by Kendra Fletcher.
Like me, Kendra is a homeschooling mom who fell for the trap of legalism. She calls legalism “hope shifting.” I love that. When we shift our hope from the finished work of Jesus in our lives and our children’s lives, we are destined to wander in the homeschool desert.
It’s so disappointing, but there aren’t six steps for leaving legalism. 🙂 Instead, like the Underground Railroad, there is a Conductor Who will lead us out of it. I pray you will follow Him.
Conclusion
If our son hadn’t made our homeschool legalism clear, I hate to think what the results would have been for our family. We still love homeschooling but not more than we love our kids and our Lord. Have you ever fallen prey to homeschool legalism? Tell me in the comments.
I didn’t think I needed strategies for homeschooling giftedness. I thought I should just be celebrating that my child loved to read and was so quick to learn. But my lack of understanding of my children’s gifts did them a disservice. I learned where I went wrong when I was asked to present on homeschooling gifted kids for my local homeschool conference. I’ve learned three things about homeschooling a child’s gift that can allow our children to flourish.
From watching movies and television, my idea of a gifted kid was a six-year-old college student or a Doogie Howser doctor. I knew for sure I didn’t have one of those, and furthermore, I had no idea how to teach a kid like that.
In reading about giftedness, however, I learned that what is typically portrayed in the media is profound giftedness. Spelling bee winners and childhood Rhodes scholars are not the epitome of giftedness. Instead, kids who are advanced in a subject or activity, kids who are fascinated by and have a voracious appetite for a subject, and kids for whom some endeavor comes easily and joyfully are likely gifted. Gifted kids may not meet the IQ criteria (which varies by source, by the way), but have a gift or talent nonetheless.
And speaking of giftedness, you may not want to give your kids the label. When I mentioned my son’s giftedness to a relative, I was immediately chastised as though it had to be kept hush-hush. I shouldn’t upset people by bragging or causing them to compare. I should pretend like he was no different than any other child.
But the truth is I see giftedness in every child. My adult autistic nephew can outbowl me any day of the week. He has bowled 300 games, something I’ve never achieved and likely never will. My brother has several learning disabilities but has always been able to put things together just by looking at the parts. I have to read the directions over and over again and still get it wrong.
I once thought I had just one gifted child but now see gifts for writing, foreign language, music, leadership, faith, interpersonal skills, humor, sports, and more. I also began to see the giftedness in the kids in my co-op. A student who struggled with writing was an inspiring speaker. A student whose grammar wasn’t perfect possessed creativity in writing that was astounding. A student who slowly and methodically approached an engineering problem solved it well before the other students.
I also began to embrace my own giftedness. Because of painful school experiences, I insisted I was no different than anyone else. I wanted friends more than I wanted to be smart. But in preparing for that talk on giftedness, I recognized myself in the description of gifted people. God has given me a gift for writing and speaking–gifts to be used for His glory. When we deny our gifts, we can’t develop them or share them. Accepting our gifts makes us better teachers for our own and others’ gifted kids.
Emphasize strengths while working on weaknesses.
I heard Joyce Herzog say that our kids will not be employed in their area of weakness, yet we tend to focus our efforts in that area. The greatest geniuses and leaders in history had weaknesses. Had the lion’s share of their time been spent on improving their weaknesses, the world likely would have been deprived of these gifted people’s inventions, knowledge, or leadership.
We do not have to have a balanced curriculum for a gifted child. If your child loves to read, let her read. Don’t insist that she be as masterful with math as with language arts. If you have an introverted child with a coding gift, don’t schedule all his time in social activities or sports. Do we want to help our children become competent in areas of weakness? Most certainly! But we can accept average in areas we know are unlikely to be an important part of our kids’ future.
A graduate student in English told me that her English and reading scores on the ACT had put her in the top 1% of all test takers, but her math score was well below average, even though she had done well in class. The university created a custom scholarship for her. She will not be taking math tests to succeed in her language arts career.
My husband is one of the most skilled salesmen and social people I know. His college GPA wasn’t stellar, but during his college years he sold gym memberships. His parents could have insisted he quit his job and focus on getting better grades. They didn’t and his first employer was most impressed with his sales experience. He has had the same lucrative career selling library books since college.
Spend your homeschool time maximizing your child’s gift. That is one of the greatest blessings of homeschooling. We can provide a tailor-made curriculum to grow our child’s gift instead of going with a one-size-fits-all curriculum. My friend’s son took a EMT course while in high school because he wants to be a doctor. My son worked 20 hours a week in management during high school because leadership is his gift. Jonathan Harris’s son developed his own drone photoraphy business.
Challenge your child.
When I spoke to parents of gifed kids, the most common question I received was “How can I challenge my child?” These parents understand that just giving a child the next grade level of curriculum isn’t the best practice.
resources for kids who are weak in an area or twice-exceptional
Sometimes we need a new approach to homeschooling our gifted child. Perhaps we are using textbooks or an online learning platform when we have a child who needs to do, to research, and even to teach in order to learn best. There are incredible options available to us now that can save us time. Sometimes we just need to tweak the curriculum we already have. We may be teaching kids together with various gifts and we need to find a way to save time and our sanity. Homeschooling Gifted Kids has you covered.
When we have a twice-exceptional child or just a child who is weaker in a subject, we need to know which options are best. That’s another reason I love Homeschooling Gifted Kids. It’s a fantastic resource for getting the challenging subjects in as well as for finding ways to stretch your child in her area of strength.
If you have a child who is profoundly gifted, there is even a section of the book on college. Cindy doesn’t tell you what to do but gives you important questions to consider in that case.
Conclusion
When you rethink what giftedness is, allow your child to focus on an area of strength, and challenge your child, your child will flourish as a homeschooler. Homeschooling is a fantastic option for teaching a gifted student. With these tips and a copy of Homeschooling Gifted Kids, you can feel confident as your gifted child’s teacher.
When we struggle in our homeschooling, it’s easy to look for answers in a book, online, or from friends. The answer is usually as close as a prayer.
Here’s how to pray powerfully over our homeschools. Of course we can pray using any words. We can pray from our hearts. We don’t need a formula. However, sometimes we don’t have the words. I am using the Lord’s prayer as a model for praying over our homeschools because we have it memorized. I’m including commentary on the prayer to help us think in alignment with God about our homeschooling. Please join me in praying over your homeschool right now.
Our Father, who art in heaven.
Some of us didn’t have loving, supportive fathers. Some of us still may not have a father who is supporting us in our homeschooling or providing loving, godly leadership for our kids.
Some of us may not have believing husbands or husbands who are our partners in home education. We may feel all alone in our work and exhausted.
Some of us may lack homeschooling friends, who know the challenges of the homeschooling lifestyle. We may not have anyone to co-op with, do play dates with, or just chat with on a regular basis.
But each of us has a Father in heaven who is far more of an encouragement and help than any earthly father, husband, or friend could ever be. He is our father, our husband, and our friend.
Hallowed be thy name.
We often forget what holy means, which is a synonym of hallowed. Holiness means that our God is not only sinless but so awesome that in His presence we would fall to our faces. We may never have been in the presence of anything that evokes that kind of awe. I know I haven’t.
God’s power and holiness aren’t just awe-inspiring though. They are available to us in our homeschooling. Every single trial and difficulty and weakness we have is tiny in comparison to the power of God. Our God is ever present with us in our homeschools. But when we pray, we experience him fully.
His kingdom is characterized by the fruit of the spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness, and self-control — all things we desperately need in our homeschools. We often think about the future kingdom at his second coming, but his kingdom can be present in our homeschools today when we pray.
Thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven.
We are often confused about what to do with a child who struggles academically or behaviorally. When we pray, we can be confident that God’s will will be done in our homeschools. Of course, God’s will is always done in our lives. But we worried homeschooling moms need reassurance. We can relax knowing that God is arranging our circumstances to ensure that His will is done in our homeschool and in our lives.
Jesus is the bread of life bread and represents everything we need for life. In 2 Peter 1:3, God promises us that we already have everything we need for life and godliness. If we have more month than money, if we have need of medical care to diagnose and treat a troubling condition, or if we need friends in our homeschooling journey, we can be confident that God will give us this bread. We can go about our day joyfully, knowing that our Father in heaven cares about us and our every need.
And forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.
We have an opportunity every day to forgive our children for their shortcomings, their immaturity, and their foolishness just as God forgives ours. In the process of asking for forgiveness, we model for our children how they should parent our future grandchildren. We model the humility that God can use to lead others to Christ.
And lead us not into temptation. But deliver us from evil.
Unlike every false God, our Father does not tempt us with things that will harm us. He does not tempt us to spend too much time online, too much money, or too much emotion on small matters. Instead, our God makes a way out from temptation. When we are ready to yell at our child for fighting with his brother once again, when we feel tempted to pull into the fast food drive-through, though we’ve already visited twice this week, or when we feel like skipping math because it makes us anxious, we can call on our God for the grace to do what we know is the right thing and He will provide it.
Although it’s easy for us to become preoccupied with avoiding evil and protecting our children from it in the form of media and peers, we can know that our God will deliver us from evil. Why?
For thine is the kingdom and the power
The power for homeschool parents to lead lives worthy of our calling does not come from us but from Him. We have only to ask for it and believe that we have it.
And the glory
We remember that the glory for smart, polite, talented children belongs to Him alone. We pray that we would ever remember how weak we are and how great He is.
Forever and ever.
The math, literature, and chore lessons will not last forever. But the discipleship will. We are raising up missionaries who will share the Gospel with others, no matter what their chosen vocation. In homeschooling we are laying up treasure in heaven. When we homeschool in faith, we will hear, “Well done, good and faithful servant.”
Amen.
We believe what we just prayed and we ask the Lord to help our unbelief as we continue to pray. Consider praying the Lord’s prayer with your children and talk with them about how the prayer applies to our homeschools. These are powerful words that grow our faith.
My thanks to our sponsor KiwiCo for supporting The Homeschool Sanity Show. Remember to go to: http://kiwico.com/homeschool to register for your kit by paying shipping only. If you would like to read a copy of my commentary on the Lord’s prayer, go to homeschoolsanity.com/Lordsprayer for the link. If you know a homeschooling friend who could use some encouragement, share this episode with her.
I’m a Christian psychologist turned homeschooling mother of six. My life can be a little crazy, so I look for sanity-saving ideas to use and share. I hope you’ll read my About page to learn more.
One of the most common concerns I hear from new homeschoolers is whether or not they’re doing enough. If that’s your question, regardless of how long you’ve been homeschooling, I have six ways you can know that you’re doing enough in your homeschool.
